Yixing Orphanage Visit (Social Welfare Institute)

Today was another major event for Yi Lai. It was the day that he said goodbye to his friends, nannies and home that he has known for over three years. In a sense, he said goodbye to the only home he can remember. It was also the beginning of Yi Lai opening up to who he really is.

As I am writing this Lai Lai is going around our hotel room putting everything back in its place and tidying up the place. Now he is giggling because Gord just fell asleep on the bed and he thinks that it is funny. He has the cutest laugh. His smile, which I hadn't seen in pictures before the adoption, is really cute too. Get the two kiddos together laughing and they get hysterical. Now what I really need help is in how to parent "twins". I think that the two of them with their strong personalities is going to be quite a handful for me. They seem to have fun together and yet really can bug each other too.

When we arrived at the orphanage we were met by the director. She quickly picked Lai Lai up and the other workers were all talking with him. I thought "oh no....don't do this" But being that she is the director I had to let her "take charge". She held Lai Lai's hand and brought him into the area where the children are. Since I could only take pictures outside I took as many as I could of the kids by the door. Andrea, I saw your little Matthew there. He is adorable and had a cute burgandy sweatshirt on and tan cords on. I told him that his mommy and daddy are coming to get him soon. He looks great and I wish so badly that they would have let me take pictures of him. I don't know why they have that policy. I told them that after you come to adopt him that we wanted to get our kids together. That didn't seem to matter. Then I saw where Lai Lai's crib is (was) and it is a stainless steel crib. I wasn't sure of what to think as I saw the empty bed. Our visit to the area where he lived was so short I didn't have much time to process anything. I think that the kids are in two rows of six. I saw quite a few special needs babies. I found out later that there was a little baby boy that Lai Lai especially liked who slept in the same room.

I also met the woman who looked after Lai Lai. She had tears in her eyes and seemed very caring. Lai Lai didn't want to go to her anymore. Which was very sad for her but was a good thing for me. He was clinging on to me. Again, I asked if I could take her picture so Lai Lai would have it for the future and was told no from the director. I could not do that either. Her teary eyes will be in my memory for a long time.

In the larger playroom next to Lai Lai's sleeping room were about 14 handicapped older children. As Gord was trying to be near them the director said that we had to go. I felt like it was a speedy whirlwind of a tour in the orphanage area that actually lasted only about 5-10 minutes. As we walked away from the orphanage section of the social welfare institute we said goodbye and Lai Lai appeared to become more relaxed. I told the director on Tuesday that we didn't have to spend a lot of time there but I felt the Lai Lai needed "closure" being that he is 3 1/2 years old. Even though our time was brief visiting the children it seemed to make a difference to Lai Lai. I wanted to hold these precious children who are considered special need children so badly but we couldn't because we were told we had to go. I tried to take in what I saw inside the orphanage in my mind.

Because we were visiting the orphanage they wanted us to stay for lunch. While we waited to have lunch at the Social Welfare Institute (SWI) I decided to take Lai Lai outside for a couple of pictures. Up to that point I hadn't seen a smile from him since we arrived at the orphanage. So I got out my camera and he smiled for me and was very happy. It was just Gord, the kids and I at that time and I think he finally felt relaxed. We had lunch with the Vice-director and a woman in charge of the nannies. Lai Lai ate a ton for lunch. They had so much food for us. It was very good. We spent a lot of time talking and asking questions. Amy, they asked how sha sha (Emma) is doing because they know that you and I are friends. I said when I saw you she was doing very well. And then Ann, I added that you little Eli was doing well too and that he has already had one of his surgeries. Angela, I told them that you and I were going to try to get our little guys together too--even though you live a few hours away from us.

(For those of you who don't already know, Amy, Ann, and I have adopted children from the same orphanage and we plan on getting the kids together. And Angela is going to be adopting Matthew soon who is also three years old from the same orphanage.)

When we returned to the van our wonderful guide, Jean, asked Lai Lai if he wanted to go home with us. He replied that he is happy and wants to go home with us! Our little kiddo was sooo excited and happy that he was coming home to stay wth us that he could hardly contain himself! He was almost bouncing off the the walls inside the van for the entire two hour trip home. I added a picture of him looking back at the orphanage when we left. We said bye bye and he was flying high after that. He kissed me two times on our way back. His eyes were brighter than ever and he even was blowing kisses. He started talking more in Chinese and I have even heard him singing. Truly a good day.

Can you imagine what a little 3 1/2 year old is thinking when he knows that his life is going to change for forever? It boggles my mind to think that he is so excited to come live with us. How do we have the honor of bringing him home to America where he has freedom and where his medical needs, spiritual needs, physical needs, and emotional needs can be met? Believe me, I am still asking God for wisdom each day in how to go about this daunting task of raising a child who has gone through so much in such a short time in his life. As Lai Lai struggles and cries so hard each time to go to sleep I pray Lord give me, or show me what I (we) need to do to help this little boy. He is so happy during the day but is fearful of falling asleep. Once he lets go and falls asleep at night he has been sleeping through the whole night.

Speaking of which it is time for me to go to sleep. Gord held Lai Lai once again while he cried so very hard while trying to fall asleep. Lai Lai keeps repeating the same phrase over and over while trying to fall asleep and I wish I knew what he was saying.

But now the he has drifted into sleep I need to get mine. You are all such a blessing to us. We are so far away and I am missing everyone. By this time next week we will be home as one big family.

Love,
Sue